The Stories We Tell Ourselves

You know that voice in your head that says “Everyone is looking at the stain on your shirt” or “I stuck my foot in my mouth again”? We all have that little voice. It can be our worst enemy or our best friend depending on the messages that it’s sharing with us. Oftentimes, it’s the worst enemy that makes the appearance in our thoughts. I don’t have to tell you that it’s unhelpful to have all of your shortcomings or fears playing in your head on repeat. It’s like you have a critic in the corner constantly booing you.

We don’t have to allow that critical voice to continue speaking though. We can flip the script. This is going to sound overly simple, but what we need to do is think differently. We need to re-train that voice to be a neutral observer or even a cheerleader. This voice didn’t develop overnight, so you aren’t going to fix it overnight either. You can start small by using this little exercise:

• In the evening, review your day and list three things that went well or made you smile. You can write them down, share them with someone or just list them in your head. It can be something small or something big.

• Continue doing this exercise every day.

• Over time you will begin to look for positives throughout your day rather than focusing on the negative. This is how you quiet that critic. Give him something else to focus on.